On the muffcake

Mike W: So I made you a cupcake.
Tara: That's so sweet!
Mike W: Actually, it's sort of like a muffin crossed with a cupcake, so it's a muffcake.

On graffiti

Mike W: I wrote graffiti.
Tara: You wrote on my car?
Mike W: No, it's from a song. "Yes indeedy, I wrote graffiti."
Tara: Doesn't saying "yes indeedy" go against the spirit of writing graffiti? That's like Ned Flanders saying he wrote graffiti.

Things said at Mike W's going away party

Chris: Anyone want some Stella [Artois]? This is terrible beer.
Ed: Way to sell it there Chris.
Chris: I mean it's delicious! Jeremy's brother said that in England it's called "wife beater".
Mike W: Do you want some Moosehead?
Ryan: That's the "wife beater" of Newfoundland.
Natalie: Although I imagine that if you have a Newfie accent, even beating your wife is quaint.

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Natalie: Once, in gradeschool, in response to the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?", I said I wanted to goal tend for the National Tonsil Hockey Association.

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Chris: So when are you flying out?
Natalie: Wednesday.
Mike W: Yup.
Chris: The only difference is that you're coming back.
Natalie: That's right. But Mike, you should totally come back for the summer.
Mike W: Yeah, you can make $8000 a month on the rigs.
Chris: But you lose fingers.
Natalie: And they put you out there for 32 days so you have to make love to a hot buttered bagel.
Mike W: I can deal with getting $8000 for a finger. I'll type with stumps.

Things said at the SNRG

Natalie: Check this out. You have to see this.
Tara: You are not attacking me with your Roomba.
Natalie: [laughs and stops steering the Roomba toward my feet]

****************************************************************

Natalie: Do you want to see something amazing? The cats are terrified of bubbles. [proceeds to blow bubbles at the cats]
Ed: Natalie, that's not nice.
Mike W: See? This is why I call this place Auschwitz.
Natalie: I'm not even touching them with the bubbles. I thought they would play with them, but the first time they saw them George backed up like he was saying "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?"
Mike W: The computer room -- Dachau.

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Mike W: That's the justice of this game.
Natalie: That's the ass-cockery of this game.
Mike W: Did you just say "ass-cockery"?
Natalie: It's a little known fact that when you get your Masters' you can make up words.

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Mike W: This is excellent watermelon.
Natalie: I can choose perfect watermelon. That's my superpower.

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Natalie: I wish I could just show my armpits and a bridge would appear.

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Natalie: Did you fart?
Mike W: No, you did.
Natalie: Great. Now you smell like spearmint leaves, chips, quiche and poop.

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Natalie: I hope Bowser dies in a fire. Being stung by bees. After he's had cancer for a while. Like 2 months of chemo.